I'm starting to rethink this whole "being a grownup" thing

So I had my meeting with the mortgage company last night and it looks like I'll be able to afford a condo priced around $125,000. But that's stretching it a little bit I think. I'm really going to have to curb my spending habits (no more Victoria's Secret shopping sprees!) but I really think I'm going to be able to do this! It's really very exciting ... and really f-ing scary. There is a LOT of time, effort and especially MONEY invested in this sort of decision. I can't help but think "Will I be able to afford it? Can I have a condo and still be able to eat? Will I be able to buy furniture or will I have to deal with crates and cardboard boxes for the rest of my life? Can't I just crawl into a hole or live in a shack in the woods somewhere?" However, I've decided that there's no backing out now. I need to do this for myself for many different reasons. I need to maintain my sanity. I need to learn to grow up and take care of myself without relying on my parents. I need to start planning my life and my future - away from my family. I need to start cultivating a life with the BF without the intrusion of my family or his family during every moment we're together. I really think our lack of privacy takes a substantial toll on our relationship. Even though we've been together over a year now, I still think we haven't been able to connect as deeply as I know we can simply because we're both so stressed out by being at home still and dealing with our parents. Christ, I'm 24 and I still get phone calls from my father asking me when I'm coming home! It's ridiculous.

So anyway, I'm diving head-first into the world of homeownership. Let's hope I don't drown.